hmmm come to think of it

i was once a boy who always wanted to the cool or popular one
yet i only hang out with people i feel comfortable with.
i was once a boy who wanted simple love
yet i only get dumped over and over.
i was once a boy who dream of staying in Singapore
yet i went back to Jakarta finish my studies.
i was once a boy who wanted so much things
yet i have restricted from all my needs.

to be the me
i really am now.

im not complaining
im actually feeling good of what i have become currently

i may not have tons of friends
but i do have friends who really care for me as a brother.
i may not stay in Singapore
but i am happy i didnt, coz if i did i may not be what i feel towards the world now.
i may not have my dreams now
but i have my family in exchange.
i may not have a simple love
but i do have you.

for all these facts i have in life

i know i will have a better future in life to compare whats my wish and dreams.
the love and support i have is well enough to go on with this difficult life.

im tired of facing this world alone

would your hold my hands
and
face this world with me ?

today i feel much diff..

maybe i had change much
maybe i been alone too long
maybe i had lost someone dearly recently
maybe i missing her too much lately

maybe this world is mad
maybe humans are just getting more and more irritating
maybe people are more selfish these days

whatever it is.
it made me realize why i isolated myself from this world.

i don't need permission to do what i like
i don't need sympathy to feel better
i don't need peoples' thoughts to judge who i am
i don't need fake feelings to care for you

coz i know i am not as good as other people are.
and when someone knows that. they have all the right things in mind to change themselves.

some people cant be isolated but i am strong enough to move on without fake friends and fake concerns. so even if there is no one reading this. i feel good telling and reflecting myself.
dont look back as i know i will be stronger than before